Recently we had an egg donor back out of a cycle, days leading up to starting medications. This came as a complete shock considering she donated multiple times previously. The donor had gone through a recent divorce and found out that she had to move out of state within two weeks for work. She felt the pressure of being a single mom and moving to a new city where she had to quickly find a new home and daycare. Adding an egg donor cycle on top of it only increased her stress level.
Although she did not want to disappoint the intended parents she knew that she would not be able to commit to the cycle 100% and did not want to jeopardize her health. The intended parents were saddened that their favorite donor was not able to cycle; however, they understood the circumstance and felt that it was best that she not proceed. With the added stress of the move, this could affect the outcome of the cycle, which is no risk anyone wants to take.
Sometimes we are unable to control an egg donor cycle and we must remember that egg donors are real people with real lives. Life can get in the way and we need to remember that. Although it is easy to be upset with the donor, it is important to remember that these are young women who have jobs, exams, and personal lives too. In the rare instance that an egg donor backs out of the cycle, it is best to keep the end goal in mind. Yes, it is easy to blame the donor and be upset about the matter but it is ultimately more important to reprioritize and make a new game plan.
Some intended parents feel that it is most important to stay on track with their scheduled fresh transfer date so for these intended parents frozen donor eggs are a great solution. For others, it is most important to find an alternate donor that is available for a fresh one-on-one. We work diligently to find alternate donors so the intended parents can get back on track quickly. In a perfect world, egg donor cycles would go flawlessly every time but as we know, life is not always perfect.